By: RJ (@rga_02)

If you gave me the option to either win at a crane game or abandon everything in life and move to some island in the Pacific, I’d chose the latter. I’m not only awful at crane games, but I hate them with a burning desire.

So you could only imagine how I felt like when I encountered one in Yakuza Kiwami.

Let me illiterate how much I hate UFO Catchers. 

I hate them. I think they are inventions from the devil himself. I think they are a money-grubbing scheme. Maybe cause I just simply suck at them, or maybe they are just all rigged and the people who are actually good at them are part of the conspiracy.

Regardless of how I feel about those dammed machines, I couldn’t escape from them in Yakuza Kiwami. 

There is a submission early on in the game where you encounter a desperate businessman trying to win a “bun-chan” for his “daughter.” Like myself, he also thinks the UFO Catcher is rigged, but he is very desperate to win a prize. Luckily for him, Kiryu bumps into him and offers him his assistance.

“Oh great,” I told myself. 

Upon my first try, I failed. Turns out I also suck in virtual UFO catchers, who would have thought. The next few turns, I managed to knock a few of them over but I still didn’t win a prize. Either I’m eternally doomed at UFO Catchers or I’m just awful at video games. 

I was about to give up on this side mission but I’d figure I would just try one more time. I slowly guided the claw over to one of the “bun-chans” and out of my amazement, it latched on and I won the prize.

For the first time ever, I won something in a UFO Catcher. Shame it was in a video game, but hey I’ll take it.

I decided to have another go with the other “bun-chans” in the machine and before I knew it I got all of them. “Yoooooooooooooooooooooo,” I shouted like a fool, so this is what it feels like to win at these things. 

I then went up to the attendant and asked them to change the prizes so I could do this again. I repeated this process more than I would care to admit. This whole experience was strangely addicting and before I knew it, I spent nearly an hour playing with a virtual UFO Catcher.

None of this will probably matter in real life. I will probably still end up looking like a fool trying to win a prize in an actual machine. But in Yakuza Kiwami, I am a UFO Catcher master, and no one can take that away from me.